A Hypochondriac's Point of View

The past few days Hubs and I have been very ill. We've been pretty pitiful. He is a day ahead of me in the healing process so he has been taking the reins of being the caregiver in our house. I don't know what I would do without him!......Oh wait. Yes, I do. I'd google my ailments. AND FEAR FOR MY LIFE.
Website: Please select your symptoms.
Me: Well...uh....let's see. A sore throat, ear pain, body aches, chills, fever, headache, and coughing. Oh! And this weird thing where my vision out of my right eye is very blurry. Probably unrelated but let's just throw it in to be safe.
Website: Rate the severity of your pain from moderate to severe.
Me: Severe. Definitely severe. I think I'm dying.
Website: Have you recently been exposed to someone with an infectious disease?
Me: ....what? Maybe....I....I don't know. Why?
Website: Here is a list of possible conditions:  Viral pharyngitis, strep throat, mononucleosis, laryngitis, tonsilitis, acute sinustis, common cold, dust exposure, indoor allergens, smoke exposure, heartburn/GERD, shingels, scarlet fever, epiglottis, mumps, thyroid cancer, hiatal hernia, bird flu
Me: SAY WHAAAAAAT???? Scarlet fever? Cancer? bird flu? GERD?!?!?
Website: Please list other symptoms. Are you currently panicking?
Me: Yes, of course!
Website: How about hyperventilating?
Me: Well I wasn't but now that you mention it....I....oh....it's {gasp} getting {gasp} harder {gasp} to {BIG gasp} breathe.
Website: Are you breaking out into a sweat?
Me: Yeah, the hyperventilating kind of brought that on..........
Website: Well it's what we suspected. You're a goner.
Me: Oh my word!  I knew it! Farewell cruel world! {cue dramatic, old school death scene}

Ok, so maybe it didn't happen exactly like that. I just feel so awful that I think it's causing me to become delirious. BLAST! I knew I forgot to add something to the symptom checker.
Well, I am going to go nurse myself back to health while I wait on Hubs to get home. A good movie, some tea, meds, and a second opinion are just what I need right now!....Eric jokingly calls me his "little hypochondriac." Hypochondriac. Hmph! I don't know where he gets that idea from! ;-)